Each culture celebrates weddings differently. Although our culture may handle them differently than what we see in the Bible, it is still a monumental occasion for couples and families alike. Weddings, even for non-Christians, still point us to the design of covenant relationships and the beauty that can be found when two people live in a way of humble submission towards each other. Wether people know it or not, to step in to marriage is to step into God's design of relationships.
If your experience is anything like mine, you've been at weddings where we have witnessed those who firmly plant themselves in a chair the second the dancing begins. At times a dash to the doors may even occur. Oh, what joy it is to watch family members tug at the stoics, those staunchly holding their position to save face until the clock strikes midnight and the victory of resistance is won. Maybe you have even been the one to resist!
The expression of having "two left feet" is often used when describing someone who simply can’t dance or is frankly not gifted in athleticism. Most of us have everything we need to learn something new but just have not put in the time to learn how to do it. In a spiritual sense, to say we have two left feet is to say that true freedom isn’t attainable for me, when our honest answer is that we simply have not put in the discipline to learn something new and to allow our revelation of Jesus through scripture to change us from the inside out.
This article is on addiction. Admittedly, I am not an expert in this field, but during seasons of life I have been desperate for freedom within myself. I have found that freedom through a consistent pursuit of Jesus and the revelations he has given both through his word, through prayer, and in worship. He is everything he claims himself to be and more. The goal is to present to you some considerations about our thought patterns and the habits we may have. Our thought patterns affect almost everything we do. Every addiction begins with the acceptance of a lie. We say yes to something that is contrary to God’s good order, and our agreement with whatever the lie may be begins to distort our thinking and our relationships. I personally want to be intentional and open to whatever God wants, but I’ve learned that to know what God wants, I must have a heart that is willing to hear what he has to say. Wherever you are at, I’ve prayed that this would unlock something within you to dig deeper in willing surrender to Jesus and the power of the Bible.
I have been in recovery ministries for many years. Today, I am no longer in these groups and don’t call myself a recovered addict. I am Paul. I am a follower of Jesus. I have been redeemed from a life of slavery that held my heart in bondage and caused tidal waves of damage to those around me because of my pride and selfishness.
I didn’t leave because I had failed the system or that I don’t believe in them. In fact, I still believe in them, and I believe that there is a time and a place for these groups. I have learned, though, that what we speak is what we believe and have come to see how many programs and teachings are out there that extract scriptures from the Bible and apply them to other things.
Like algorithms on social media, I’ve also realized many things are designed to keep us coming back through a reward process. Dopamine is a hormone and a neurotransmitter that our brains use to process pleasure, make decisions, and it affects our daily functions. Dopamine plays a large factor in our reward system. When we do something that feels good, our brain releases a rush of dopamine. The repetitive cycle begins when we seek more of that good feeling by duplicating the behavior that made us feel good.
I found myself at a crossroads in my own journey seeking to discern where the Lord was leading me. Within five years of beginning, I was given an opportunity to lead our local recovery ministry and was having discussions about leadership on both the state and national levels. I was a way away from being equipped for that type of influence, but I could see that it was attainable because of what I had already experienced God doing in my life. I was hesitant to jump on board and even more so when someone proposed a question to me about my own recovery involvement. He simply asked “when are you going to quit these programs? and followed up with “It seems as though your groups are limiting you from what God wants to show you.”
This question and statement were hard to hear, but something in me knew he was right. I feared that if I let go of recovery groups, I would fall back into an addiction and destroy everything I had worked so hard to obtain. Ironically, that’s precisely what we are told in most recovery programs. “If you leave us, you are one step closer to a relapse.”
Don’t get me wrong, I do believe these groups are beneficial and the accountability they offer help keep us from backsliding, but at the same time we simply don’t hear about anything like this in the Bible. Learning about true authenticity and genuine relationships can begin in these groups and some of it is not far off of the type of discipleship relationships we see Jesus having. However, it is in Jesus Christ himself where will find our true source of life and freedom.
Around this time, I had heard a message where John 7:38 was brought up. This is a statement made by Jesus at a Feast of Tabernacle celebration, a time when Jews would gather and remember God’s provision to the Israelites in the wilderness after their escape from Egypt. Part of this celebration including a water ritual which commemorated God pouring out water from a rock in the desert to provide drink for the Israelites, an account we hear of twice in the Exodus story. It was during this portion of the Sukkot, or Feast of Tabernacle that Jesus stood and said “Whoever believes in me, as Scripture has said, rivers of living water will flow from within them.” As staggering as it may have been for the original audience to hear Jesus say this, I also read it over and over. I knew I was after living waters, and this account of Jesus' statement revealed something to me. I wanted the living water and the clear pathway there was to get to know what the scriptures say about him.
First, mayim is the description associated with the “deep” (Genesis 1:2). It is chaos. When the Spirit of the Lord hovers over the waters, God brings order to chaos. This is the opening bell sounded by the Hebrew view of God – a God of ordered existence. From this verse on, we see God’s handiwork bringing order to all creation. That order extends right to our way of living. Hayyim (from the verb which means to be, to be alive, to live) is the difference between the dust from which we came and the animated life God breathed into us.
ADDICTION IS NOT BIASED
Before we go further, I want to clarify a common misconception about addiction and recovery groups. There are groups that are specific to a certain substance such as alcohol or drugs, but anything that we go to that takes the place of God and the Bible for wisdom, understanding, or comfort, is a form of an addiction. Because we were made to bear the image of God, we also are designed to be in relationship with him, allowing him to give us wisdom and understanding about how to live and to act. Jesus made this abundantly clear in his teachings when he would say things like “I am the vine; you are the branches. If you remain in me and I in you, you will bear much fruit; apart from me you can do nothing. John 15:5. Addiction can come in many forms and is no particular of persons. Many of us, often without realizing it, have certain behavior patterns that can classify as an addiction, and even more common are areas of life that need some type of healing.
No matter what a person believes, God’s word never comes back void (Isaiah 55:11) and his character never changes. (James 1:17). We can wrestle with our own understand of what is good and right and true, but the source of all truth will always be God, and it is through his knowledge that we will experience true life. A life that willingly offers itself back to the one whom gave us the freedom. Clearly said, we worship ourselves when we live without God, without prayer, without community, without the word.
If you are still wondering how all this ties into addictions, let me say that an addiction is never the core issue. There is a reason below the surface as to why we may go to something other than God, but first it’s important to understand what an addiction is.
Addiction is defined as a neuropsychological disorder characterized by a persistent and intense urge to use a drug or engage in a behavior that produces natural reward, despite substantial harm and other negative consequences. Repetitive drug use can alter brain function in synapses similar to natural rewards like food or falling in love[1] in ways that perpetuate craving and weakens self-control for people with pre-existing vulnerabilities.[2]
This definition uses the phrase natural reward. The natural reward we receive comes from a spike in dopamine. Dopamine is a chemical in our brains that helps regulate pleasure, motivation, and attention. In rare cases, some people need the assistance of medication to help regulate this chemical, but many of us make choices to seek this sense of satisfaction outside of God rather than because of God. Dopamine is part of Gods design of our neurological systems. It’s a good thing, but because of free will, we experience a form of creation that is distorted and broken. We face heartache. We have questions and pain. We have many options as to how we navigate our lives and where our source of contentment come from.
ITS NOT ABOUT THE ADDICTION
Addiction itself is never the core issue. There is a reason below the surface, something we are wrestling with in our hearts that tests us. This often is ground zero for spiritual warfare and what we believe guides how we process these things. Each of us have developed a moral compass, a source of understanding, and a way of reasoning that begins the moment we are born. Studies show that a Childs brain is 80% developed by the age of 3 creating up to 1 million neural connections per second and 90% developed by the age of 5.[3]. These formative years are greatly impactful and are influenced by many factors including our environments, stress, sleep, diet, and wellbeing of our caretakers. Other factors that contribute to the development of our minds include genetics, brain chemistry, mental health disorders, trauma and stress, lack of support or resources, early exposure to drugs, alcohol, or sex.
RIVAL KINGDOMS
Our parents, those who have raised us, have experienced the same kind of challenges in this world and if God isn’t the source of wisdom, understanding, and comfort, then the world becomes the teacher. Our feelings and experiences become our source of truth and wisdom. The Bible is clear about the existence of two rival kingdoms and Jesus’s primary message is the coming and establishment of the kingdom of God. In John 8:36 Jesus said, “My kingdom is not of this world. If it were, my servants would fight to prevent my arrest by the Jewish leaders. But now my kingdom is from another place.” There is a rival nation to that of the ways of our world, and we cannot serve both kingdoms. These deeper heart issues are the things that can enslave us if we give credit to the lies. If we begin to ruminate over the pain, the challenge, the fear, the guilt, we give life to the thing that can literally take life.
Each one of us will have to decide whether we believe that God is the source of all life and wisdom, however if you say yes, that decision means the journey of a whole new life. This is the beauty of the discipleship endeavor. Freedom is there, but it requires a different way of living, thinking, and purpose and the pathway to experiencing this life is found in the day to day moments, walking with God and with each other. Believing in Jesus doesn’t automatically give us a download of the Bible and teach us discipleship. We must put in the effort to learn new things and put in the reps and we are called to spur one another on through that process. True freedom will not be found in adding Jesus to our life or extracting scripture to fit our narrative, but by allowing our story to be part of God’s story, together. This is the TOV way of life.
Romans 12:2 states Do not conform to the pattern of this world but be transformed by the renewing of your mind. Then you will be able to test and approve what God’s will is—his good, pleasing and perfect will.
This statement by Paul in this letter to the church in Rome was in response to many of the challenges these new believers were having. Their understanding of God and Jesus was being changed in so many ways, and they were trying to figure things out. There were imperial systems even within the church that had to be unlearned, there were elitist beliefs about the Jews being God’s chosen elect and that Gentiles were a lesser category of humans, there was spiritual legalism and dogmatism that kept people’s hearts far from God. These are just a few examples of the spiritual understandings that these people were having to wrestle through. This doesn’t even address the upside down way of living and loving that encompassed many of Jesus’s teachings not to mention their understanding of covenant faithfulness. All that to say, this group of new believers of Jesus the messiah had a lot to work through.
Our list of unlearning is not much different than those whom the Bible was written to.
God has set into motion from the beginning, his good order, from mayim to shaloam, chaos to peace and order. All of creation is designed to work in harmony with each other and our creator. We are designed by God and for God and each other. Learning these things may take some undoing and relearning, but it's on the way there that we experience the goodness of God.
“If you obey all the decrees and commands I am giving you today, all will be well with you and your children. I am giving you these instructions so you will enjoy a long life in the land the LORD your God is giving you for all time.” Deuteronomy 4:40
“Anyone who believes in me may come and drink! For the Scriptures declare, ‘Rivers of living water will flow from his heart.’” John 7:38
“A good man brings good things out of the good stored up in his heart, and an evil man brings evil things out of the evil stored up in his heart. For the mouth speaks what the heart is full of.”
Luke 6:45
Freedom from addiction is described as a process that requires active participation and belief in God's truth, rather than an instant change [4]. It’s trusting that God knows what's best, even when tempted by addictive behaviors [5]. The Bible presents this freedom not as complete autonomy, but as becoming a "servant of God"[6]
This change is often called spiritual formation. Just as our minds are formed so quickly in our early years, it’s up to us to determine our current source of worship. Why worship? I say worship because a better understanding of worship is not simply singing songs as we often may think, but worship rather is what we do with our time and resources and why we do it. That’s why Paul exhorts the Romans to offer their bodies as living sacrifices and describes this as “true and proper worship.” (Romans 12:1. Emphasis mine). We are designed to be fully devoted to the Lord, mutually committed as he has set covenantal faithfulness as an example for us.
ADDICTION AS IDOL WORSHIP
To be blunt, addiction is idol worship. When we live a life apart from God, depression, oppression, anxiety, fear, and inconsistency become part of our everyday life. We find ourselves constantly discontented. When we create the artificial safe houses of our addictions, are we not constructing a misrepresentation of God’s true creation? Doesn’t that entail that addiction is really idolatry? And isn’t idolatry the most serious of all sins of mankind?
Woe to us, those who have no safe place in the world. We will survive, but we will survive as idolaters, cut off from real life, wasting away in our self-constructed death row cells. We’ll have company, no doubt, but we won’t have communication for communication requires vulnerability and vulnerability means risk, the very risk that we wish to avoid. Yes, addictions kept us alive in the interim. But they become solitary confinement cells if we don’t exit when grace arrives.
As a side note, repeated substance abuse can and does alter the physical psyche of humans and how our brains operate, thus leading to a chemical dependency that needs attention from medical professionals. It doesn’t mean that we shouldn’t still pray for healing, however, if we have taken and distorted God’s good order of our bodies with chemicals, it would make sense we need assistance from those who have spent years studying the incredible human body. We want to eventually go after the thought process that led us to and addiction, but there may first be a time when the chemical dependency needs to be safely removed so true healing can begin.
There are those who the Lord has appointed to help provide freedom from this life and seeking the help of a professional is at times the first sign of wisdom. Although the medical world may be just as influenced by the ways of world as any other field, I’ve personally learned to view medical professionals and professional counselors/psychologists as healers. Their time spent studying the human psyche may be invaluable for seasons of our lives. Shame has no place in the kingdom of God and Roman’s 8:1-2 confirms it. “Therefore, there is now no condemnation for those who are in Christ Jesus, because through Christ Jesus the law of the Spirit who gives life has set you free from the law of sin and death.”
There may be a season when those who have dedicated large portions of their lives to studying the human psyche may be the exact people God will use to help foster healing as our minds are redeveloped to understanding Gods truths. Our world may call this weakness, but humility is one of the most powerful attributes of God’s character and this should be ours.
He mocks proud mockers, but shows favor to the humble and oppressed.
Proverbs 3:34
In the same way, you who are younger, submit yourselves to your elders. All of you, clothe yourselves with humility toward one another, because “God opposes the proud but shows favor to the humble.” 1 Peter 5:5
Godly wisdom, according to the Bible, is the source of life and understanding.
“The beginning of wisdom is: Get wisdom! And with all you have gotten, get understanding.”
Proverbs 4:7 NIV
It is not fitting for a fool to live in luxury— how much worse for a slave to rule over princes! Proverbs 19:10
In Proverbs 19:10, the root word for fool is kesil. Kesil characterizes those who are not only spiritually deficient, but morally corrupt. It is someone who despises Godly wisdom. [7]. It is the opposite of freedom.
DESIGNED TO GARDEN
We are designed to keep and cultivate creation. As image bearers, our testimony of God is best expressed in the way we live. If we are operating through worldly ways, we will not experience the peace that can only come from God. Practical steps towards freedom include recognizing sin in one's life and bringing thoughts into obedience to Christ. It's emphasized that the primary weapon against addiction is a heart cleansed by Jesus Christ and a mind filled with His presence.[8]
Keeping and cultivating creation requires not just Godly wisdom but Godly influence. Godly influence comes only from God himself. [9] A chemically dependent baby due to a mother’s drug use while in utero, is not a character trait nor is it a family curse. The chemical dependency came from a lie that the mother believed that led to drug use to escape or numb. Using substances in ways to regulate our chemical brain balance is a learned behavior and signifies a deeper heart issue. We will not find freedom from addiction if you’re simply looking to stop the pain. Many people quit a behavior but never get to the root of why the behavior was there. God is not after behavior modification. He wants to transform us into his image. It is the process of Christoformity, or what we know of as sanctification.
Consider 2 Corinthians 5:15-17
“He died for everyone so that those who receive his new life will no longer live for themselves. Instead, they will live for Christ, who died and was raised for them. So we have stopped evaluating others from a human point of view. At one time we thought of Christ merely from a human point of view. How differently we know him now! This means that anyone who belongs to Christ has become a new person. The old life is gone; a new life has begun!”
There is a promise of a new life here and now, but to Paul’s point, it’s the beginning of a new life, a restored life, a life in which moves towards healing and wholeness. Adam and Eve knew God shamelessly in Eden. There was no need for redemption or reconciliation. There was no need of healing and restoring. There was no barrier between them and the glory of God at first.
We have a barrier. We have pain, trauma, misunderstandings, ungodly knowledge, and pride. At our core, we are meant for covenant faithfulness to God. It must be our choice to step in bold faith and believe God in all things and for all things, including allowing God to expose anything in us that is not from him. Adam knew Eve. He joined with her in the most intimate, interconnected way. God is offering us and desiring from us this same type of relationship that existed in the garden.
DOUBLEMINDENESS
Is it possible to believe two opposing thoughts at the same time?
Believe it or not, yes, we can believe opposing viewpoints to be true. It’s called cognitive dissonance, or what the Bible defines as doublemindedness. This is where we get the idea of Jeckyle and Hyde or split personalities. It doesn't mean both things are true, but it's important to see how easily our minds can be deceived.
“But when you ask, you must believe and not doubt, because the one who doubts is like a wave of the sea, blown and tossed by the wind. That person should not expect to receive anything from the Lord. Such a person is double-minded and unstable in all they do." James 1:6-8
The Lord desires to build us up into what we were created for and to expose the things that have hindered us from getting there, but embarking on the process has to be our choice. We can feel pulled in multiple directions if we are wrestling with worldly beliefs and God's truths at the same time. This leads to an inconsistent personality.
Is it worth it?
Some of this may sound like a lot of work. It is! For those of us who are parents, and even those who aren’t, we often will go to the ends of the earth for those we care about. What if we went after freedom and healing as if lives depended on it. After all, maybe they do. You have a high level of influence. We all do. Many of us have used other people, our circumstances, our past, our upbringings, even misused scripture as an excuse to not seek after healing with our whole heart as though lives depended on it. It’s time those excuses become simply a memory of the past and we step into a future that is anointed with the presence and the power of the Lord because of our commitment to leave the entire old life behind us.
As funny as the resistance of some people to dance at a wedding may sound, most of the time we just don’t want to learn something new. It may seem embarrassing, we might look silly in front of others, but what if it’s all about the wedding dance? What if the freedom we so desire is one step closer to the dance floor of healing from any kind of addiction behavior and way of thinking? There is a dance of grace that is waiting for us to grab hold of. It’s up to you and me to decide if we are going to respond. So, what's it going to be??
WHERE TO BEGIN?
LET'S PRAY
You made it this far!
Let’s simply begin with prayer. Have a conversation with God about what’s really going on in your heart. Write it down. Ask God to reveal what may be a lie, or something you’ve believed that is contrary to God character and God’s word.
CALL IT OUT
The removal of a lie begins by admitting one was there and calling it out for what it is. It’s simply not true.
You believed something that you are now renouncing as untrue.
What does God’s word say that is contrary to that lie?
Write down the lie and write down the truth in scripture. Whenever you are reminded of the lie, call it out for what it is and speak into your heart the truth of God’s word. This simple method alone will lead to freedom if you are consistent.
WHERE'S WALDO?
Second, find someone.
If you don’t have anyone, find a local church. If you’re with us at TOV, find any one of us and simply start the conversation. We cannot do this alone, and that means without you either. God offers freedom to all, not some, but only few answer. We are praying you are one of the bold ones who answer the call and step into the authentic life God has designed for you.
To know God is to know his word, but even our best interpretations can be misunderstood or misused. It's vital that we don't speak anything over ourselves or others that Jesus and his atoning work hasn't spoken. True freedom is available, but few experience it due to the work and humility needed to embark on the journey. Romans 12:2 puts the ball in our court. It calls us to step out of the world an into God's kingdom.
Stepping into freedom brings us one step closer to the Tov existence we are designed for. Could it be that our systems, our recovery groups may only paint a partial picture of the discipleship communities we are meant to exist and thrive in? Is God calling you deeper into devotion to him and into a thriving existence within covenant community?
Let's keep after it together. Paul discusses the ministry of reconciliation that is now ours to own and take hold of as discussed in 2 Corinthians 5. The healing of nations begins with the healing of our own hearts. God won't simply erase our past and there are consequences to our waywardness, but he is the same God that raises dead bodies to life and it is through his spirit journey back to the tov meod life found in the garden.
Addictions have long destroyed even the houses of those who love the Lord. It's time we step in and grab hold of the true ToV life that is found through humility, authenticity, and healing.
A special thank you to Doc Ryan for your devoted mentorship and editorial contribution to this article. https://expedition44.com/
[1]Andy Partington, Hope in Addiction: Understanding and Helping Those Caught in Its Grip (Chicago, IL: Moody Publishers, 2023), 90.
[2] Pete Sulack, Unhealthy Anonymous: Exposing the Greatest Threat to Your Health and Happiness (Shippensburg, PA: Destiny Image, 2015).
[3] https://developingchild.harvard.edu/science/key-concepts/[1] [2] Laura E. Anderson, When Religion Hurts You: Healing from Religious Trauma and the Impact of High-Control Religion (Grand Rapids, MI: Brazos Press, 2023), 85–86.
[4]Hope for the Heart, Alcohol & Drug Abuse: Breaking Free and Staying Free, Keys for Living Library: Addiction and Recovery (Hope for the Heart, 2024), 130.
[5]Jonathan Pokluda and Kevin McConaghy, Welcome to Adulting: Navigating Faith, Friendship, Finances, and the Future (Grand Rapids, MI: Baker, 2018).
[6]David R. Dunham, Addictive Habits: Changing for Good, ed. Deepak Reju, 31-Day Devotionals for Life (Phillipsburg, NJ: P&R Publishing, 2018), 43.
[7] http://biblehub.com/hebrew/3684.htm
[8] Elmer L. Towns, How to Pray: When You Don’t Know What to Say (Ventura, CA: Regal; Gospel Light, 2006), 49.
